fantasy excerpt of a president’s speech upon being elected, in 2016, for instance

Thank you America!  What an incredible journey.  What an amazing day.  No surprise that I started menstruating this morning – the campaign being over, nothing to do but wait for the results.

Throughout our lives, we are reminded: there is a time for planting, a time for letting go.  As I menstruate today, I am humbled by the reminder that all that I am will one day return to the earth.  Therefore I focus my presidency on the future generations that will spring up, and not only toward benefit in my lifetime.

Sometimes menstruation means our hopes for new life are dashed.  Sometimes menstruation means unwanted change has been averted.  Always it reminds us that we are never fully in control of our lives, and that we must focus our attention on what we can control – our attitudes, intentions, deliberate actions.  Let us be prepared for both abundance and drought.  I dedicate my presidency to humble readiness, to mighty action.

Menstruation teaches us that the “down cycle” is part of nature’s plan, not an illness; in fact, the only thing in nature that grows without renewal is cancer.  Let us become ready as a nation to face leaner times, and not be economically and psychologically dependent on a constant upswing.

Menstruation makes room for innovation by letting go obsolete plans and dreams.  Thus renewed, we face the future and see, not what hopes were on our foremothers’ and forefathers’ horizon, but what magnificence lies in wait on our own.

Posted July 23rd, 2011 in Uncategorized.

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